Processing Your Story through Christian Counseling

Are you struggling to process certain parts of your story? If so, you’re not alone. Continue reading to learn how Christian counseling can become an integral part of your healing and growth journey. Let’s start by considering a few examples:

Tim is a 25-year old who always felt like something was missing from his life. He did not have a father figure to mentor him and help him during various trials and through major decisions in his life. He wants fatherly advice but does not know where to turn.

He has questions about why his father abandoned him as a child and does not understand why he did not want to be a part of his life. This feeling often holds him back from going all-in when it comes to emotional relationships. He fears rejection. He fears abandonment. He is fearful of how the unknowns will impact his journey to marriage and parenthood.

Gemma is a 33-year old mom of three who always felt like it was too late to seek help for her lingering pain from the past. Her parents were abusive alcoholics and she always struggled with the emotional baggage and does not want to continue the cycles of verbal and physical abuse.

She does not know where to turn for mentorship and help to work through this vicious cycle that she lived through. She wants to know what is “normal” and what is unhealthy behavior. She yearns for a healthy emotional attachment but feels like self-help books are inadequate for helping her figure it all out.

Martin is a 40-year old first responder who has served his community for over twenty years. He has given his heart and soul to the job – working to make every patient feel taken care of and hopeful on their worst of days. Unfortunately, the job continues to chip away at his belief and hope in humanity.

The violence, the sickness, the death – every single call has impacted him without realization of just how much it has taken a toll on his emotional health. He continues to see hatred spewed daily and does know how to cope with the physical and emotional effects the job is taking on him.

Christian counseling is available to help these individuals and it is also available to you, regardless of your story. Sometimes the hazy and overwhelming weight of the world feels like it is too much to bear.

Perhaps the bills seem endless, kids seem more demanding than usual, and your marriage and faith seem to be fizzling; but you are not sure why things seem so overwhelming. Perhaps your past relationships are holding you back from living your life to the fullest and loving others with an all-in mentality.

Sometimes acceptance is the first step to healing. Accepting what happened in the past does not mean forgetting. It means accepting that God can use the past for good. It means accepting our stories and allowing God to use them for His glory.

Steps to Processing Your Story

Perhaps your story is one that can help someone else who is walking through something similar. Perhaps your story can be used as an opportunity to learn to embrace compassion for others who are struggling.

Take time to process your story.

To begin your path towards healing, you must process your grief. It is important to unleash those years of bottled up feelings. It is imperative to release those regrets and feelings of falling short. It is okay to be angry. When we bottle up our feelings, we continue to pile on the hurt rather than address it.

Feelings are instrumental to the coping and healing process. C.H. Spurgeon said, “All our infirmities, whatever they are, are just opportunities for God to display his gracious work in us.” We must first process what has happened to allow God to use our past for His glory.

Take time to journal your thoughts.

Hal Elrod said, “Writing in a journal each day allows you to direct your focus to what you accomplished, what you’re grateful for, and what you’re committed to doing better tomorrow.” Journaling is an invitation to process what you have been through. It is accepting the past and looking forward to the future. Journaling is also a great way to unleash all the thoughts running around in your mind and give you time to zero in on specifics of your past, present, and future.

Pursue Christian counseling to help rebuild a foundation of trust.

Roy T. Bennett said, “You never change your life until you step out of your comfort zone; change begins at the end of your comfort zone.” While it may be overwhelming to think about scheduling your first appointment, you will find the counseling setting to be warm, genuine, and inviting. It is not a place of shame or pointing fingers, but of helping you release the inner turmoil. Making the step to address your past is choosing healing over turmoil.

Be gentle with yourself and refocus negative self-talk.

To truly begin the healing process, it is essential to look for grace on the difficult days. It is also important to refocus negative self-talk to hope-filled thoughts for the future. While thoughts from the past may be haunting you, refocusing those thoughts is a great start to a new chapter. Your thoughts dictate your actions. Take those negative thoughts captive and replace them with thoughts of a hope-filled future.

Philippians 4:8 reminds us, “Finally, brothers, whatever is true, whatever is honorable, whatever is just, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is commendable, if there is any excellence, if there is anything worthy of praise, think about these things.” The things we think about are the things we begin to believe about ourselves. It is important to dwell on the promises of God rather than the scars of the past.

Confide in a close friend.

It is important to have someone in your life in which you can confide. Do you have a close friend who knows about the things that you struggle with from the past? It is helpful to have someone you can call, text, or have coffee with when you are having a difficult day. We need someone we can talk to when our thoughts are getting the best of us.

We need someone who can encourage us when the world feels heavy. We all need a strong support system – regardless of whether your story is like any of the individuals mentioned above. Your story matters and it is still being written. Do not let any issues from your past continue to impact all that God has in store for you today and in the future.

How Christian Counseling Can Help

Christian counseling is available to you today so you can address whatever may be holding you back, taking your thoughts captive, or making you feel like your story is not significant, but this is a lie. There is beauty beyond any of the pain that fills your heart. The first step is to reach out to a counselor and reach up to God and allow Him to intervene and fill your heart and mind with hope for the future.